Dirty Doctors

Posted on Thu Jan 6th, 2011 @ 3:37pm by Lieutenant Commander Jonathan Mantell & Lieutenant Kiyraesyn Valdor

Mission: Hippocratic Hijacking
Location: Various
Timeline: Backpost: Takes place prior to "Getting Underway"

With the bridge now occupied by crew preparing the ship for departure, the Miran boy had decided to find refuge someplace more private. Unlike the Captain's Ready Room, located on the prime real-estate just off the main bridge, Jack's office was located a deck below. It was fitting, however, that it should be on the same deck as the Engineering compartment dedicated to the ship's detachable saucer section. The boy made a mental note to visit that particular engine room when his work was cleared up.

As the doors of his office slid open, Jack's mouth dropped open in tandem. The desk of his brand new office was carpeted with PADDs of all shapes and sizes, every inch of it. That certainly explained why Cowell's own desk was pristine and spotless, with not so much as a stray isolinear chip lying on its surface.

"That dirty bastard!" he exclaimed, to no one in particular. The doors of his office had shut, and there was no one else inside. The boy could almost imagine the smug look on Cowell's face at the moment, knowing that his first officer was dealing with all the reports, requests and last minute operations that had to be completed before the ship could leave dock. And just who had the esteemed commanding officer, only minutes before, bestowed that enjoyable task on?

Folding his arms in protest, Jack landed viciously in his chair, only to jump up again a millisecond later. Spinning around to face the seat, the boy discovered that the desk wasn't the only surface in the room covered in PADDs. With a discontented sigh, he cleared his chair with a single swipe of his arm, dumping the PADDs unceremoniously onto the floor. As he sat down, the Miran did the same to his desk, so that the only surface left holding a PADD was the floor.

Satisfied with the spontaneous summer cleaning he'd just given his desk, the boy leaned forward. Entering a few commands into his desk computer, he drew up the ship's personnel manifest again, looking for any late arrivals. Spotting one, Jack grinned to himself, activating the particular record of the newcomer. This isn't so hard, the boy told himself. His expression fell as soon as he read the assignment title on the newcomer's file.

...Kiyraesyn Rhys Valdor, Chief Medical Officer...

"Aww, maaaaan." If anyone had been in the room, the verbal protest might have been more effective. A doctor. Why did the ship's doctor have to be one of the last ones to come on board? Jack was playing catch-up with most of the crew who had arrived before he did, in which case a doctor could be easily avoided by way of busy-ness or forgetfulness. None of those seemed like a particularly feasible option now.

With almost a noticeable spark, the boy lifted his head, an idea in mind. Clearing his throat, Jack tapped his combadge, "Commander Mantell to Lieutenant Valdor. Please report to my office." The boy grinned to himself, confident in his plan's infallibility.

"Actually, Commander, according to the database, you're not on file, and until you are, this ship isn't going anywhere, so you may as well join me here in Sick Bay." Kiyraesyn's voice resonated over the comm in a cool tone.

Damn, dirty doctors! Out of all the places on a ship, sickbay was the last place he wanted to be. Every doctor he saw seemed delighted to do nothing else but poke and prod the boy, running scans for an abysmal amount of time -during which Jack had to remain completely still, of course- and making him contort in uncomfortable ways, like raising his right arm straight up while turning his head and saying 'ahhh.' He'd seen enough doctors over the last century to swear them off forever. Too bad Starfleet doctors had the medical authority to actually carry out the threat that this one had delivered.

If it was possible to experience any further lament at his predicament as Executive Officer over being Chief Engineer again, Jack was certainly living it. Instead of hiding in the engine room with its multitudes of rooms, junctions and duties, all he had were four walls of an office, and a title that required exactly what the ship's doctor had explained. The Miran had made his bed, now, it was time to lie in it. With a false bravado for no one's benefit of himself, the boy pumped up his chest and tapped the metallic badge that rested on it once more.

"Fine," the boy muttered, with a distinct tone of resentment in his voice. "I'm on my way."

Minutes later, Valdor heard the sweeping of the large grey Sick Bay doors opening. She had already prepared the tray of tools needed to perform a full physical. As she turned to greet the incoming Commander Mantell, an expression of absolute disbelief played across her sharp aspect.

"What is this, some sort of joke? Where is Commander Mantell?" She ordered, temporarily unaware of the fact that the boy standing in front of her was indeed the ship's Executive Officer. Just then, she noticed the pips on his collar and a sudden realisation struck her. "Oh, you're Miran! I apologise, sir. Like I said before, you're not in the database and it's been nearly two centuries since I've come into contact with a member of your species." Catching herself rambling, the CMO stopped herself and inhaled deeply before opening her mouth again. "I apologise, sir. I'm Kiyraesyn Valdor, the Chief Medical Officer, as you probably are already aware. Shall we get started?"

At the doctor's first words, the boy wondered if she was trained at all in cosmetic procedures. Perhaps Jack could get her to tattoo the word MIRAN across his forehead. Some people certainly needed the extra reminder.

"Yeah, sure," the boy grumbled, holding up a single finger to signal the doctor's delay. "But here's the rules. You can scan and look, but none of this touching and poking stuff. No weird body movements. And above all, no coughing or saying 'ahhh!'" Jack opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue to emphasis his last direction.

"You needn't feel uncomfortable, Commander, I've been practising medicine for three and a half centuries. I'm El-Aurian, you see, and therefore extremely well-traveled." Valdor began to conduct her exam by scanning him with a medical tricorder. Next, she picked up a hypospray. "I'm afraid it's vital that I retrieve a sample for the database."

The Miran remained unmoving as the medical tricorder was passed over his body. His disgust at the procedure was vividly displayed on his face, growing worse as Valdor attempted to reassure him. "I've seen enough doctors to last me a lifetime." Those words were no callous remark, given that Starfleet Medical's own estimates put the Miran boy's -as well as the rest of his species- lifespan at somewhere around 80,000 years. So far, the doctor had been playing nicely within his rules, but when she picked up a hypospray, Jack recoiled.

"Nuh-uh," the boy shook his head, his sharp refusal made even more evident as he took a step backwards. He made a mental note to add that to his list of rules. "No samples." Hesitating for a moment, Jack raised a hand to his head. He pulled at a hair until it was released from his head, ignoring the discomfort, and handed it to the doctor. Resisting the urge to giggle, he amended his earlier refusal, "Here, you can have this. Will that work?"

Kiyraesyn accepted the hair follicle and sighed. Now she remembered why she had stayed away from Mirans all these years. She placed the follicle on a glass petrie dish and ran it through the appropriate scanning system. After a moment of waiting, the system reported back with a full extrapolation of the subject's DNA and analysis of its genetic makeup. Next, she input the transfer protocol which allowed her to compress the information and store it in the medical database as a key component of his physical profile.

"Alright, you're good to go." Valdor announced upon completion of the transfer. "Thank you for coming down, sir...and sir! I am sorry about before, when you first came in."

Jack's expression mellowed, satisfied that his evasiveness had won him a hard-earned battle against the forces of medicine. Another doctor trained, the amused thought played across his mind, causing the boy to grin. As he started toward the door, he glanced over his shoulder, "Oh, yeah. By the way, welcome to the Arizona."