Yet another blunder

Posted on Mon Apr 4th, 2011 @ 7:11pm by Lieutenant JG Thomas Beliard

"Personal log. Thomas Beliard.

I'm not even sure why I am doing this, as no one will ever hear it, but here goes. About 3 years ago, my sister Kathy told me I needed to open up to people. And here I am. I spent all of 12 hours on the planet for my first shore leave in 2 years. I'll be honest, at the time I didn't care.

People tend not to like me, and I can't blame them. I had a good sending off from UP, but that was 'cause I contributed so much to my sisters research. What gets me is something she said on the last subspace com she sent me. Have I made any friends yet? No, sister, I haven't, quite the opposite. I've been lucky to not have had the entire ship hate me so far. I even questioned the captain at our first staff meeting.

I love being out here in the dark of space, but I know that people don't like being in the dark of space with me. I see this as another Aberdeen. This feels like another posting where those who try to be my friends get pushed off by my inability to be nice to people. These people are pleasant enough, even if a little off, but I already feel like I've done things to make those around me uncomfortable. Hell, maybe I am not cut out for deep space. Maybe I am too much a jerk to be tolerable. I sure hope this next mission goes better. Maybe I'm not the kind of person meant to be personable with others. I don't Know.

Computer, end log."